Jesus Christ the Lord will save every person in existence, trust in Him all ends of the Earth, and you will be saved, all of you!

1 Corinthians 15:22 "In Christ shall all be made alive"

 

Journal Entry 32 – Trial and Tried

October 17^th (Tuesday) 2017

You know what I fear the most, people talking behind my back. As an INFJ I have this crazing to know everything and to have all of this power, so when I’m in a situation where I don’t know everything (theological debates) and when I can’t have all of the power, I tend to go a lil coo coo.

I choose it when I can see that she’s setting things up so I don’t miss out on anything important.

She said that she’ll give me a question last so that I can find out how things work. She gave all the other people normal questions like…

“What are you planning to do tomorrow”

“What are you planning to do this weekend”

“What do you want to be when you grow up”

Etc, etc, etc.

Now this questions she asked me were downright bizarre.

1) “Would you want to be an astronaut”

Almost seems like an inclination or a rhetorical question.

 Don’t you know that I’ve wanted to and still do want to kill myself every day and that God was the only thing that made my life worth living? [Future Song here, the Lord upholds me]

Back then, I didn’t think that I’d make it to the long time pleasures, because they’d take a long time commitment. Back then, I didin’t think that I’d have a long time to live before I’d jump off a high place and die in a quick instance. I’m saved now through belief alone in Jesus Christ, once saved always saved, but just because I’m a Christian doesn’t mean that feeling has left me. In fact, I’m probably going to live with this feeling for the rest of my life, nothing can make me whole, only heaven can. That’s why I focus on Heaven, it’s the only thing that’s worth my time.