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Journal Entry 114 – Happy Thoughts
January 8th (Monday) 2018
but now I feel… so happy. Ahhh… Happy Thoughts.
I just feel genuinely happy. I was triggered when some guy said that he couldn’t sleep at my , and my mind kept on thinking about it, but now I don’t care about it. It’s over. Besides, if I couldn’t sleep, it would be fine because I have such a comfy and cozy and cuddly and soft blanket to wrap around and cuddle
A nice shower, some nice tea, some nice cuddles, some nice meditation, some nice music. Ahhh…
Who cares if I couldn’t sleep, because that means that I have much more energy to have fun and play. Plus, if I get tired the next day, it increases my chances of sleeping!
I’m not going to think about IT (there actually isn’t anything here, it’s just to complete the look), I’m just going to relax and be happy. I’m happy and I’m ok. Ahhh…. Wonderful feelings, happy thoughts.
Everyone has a problem when I think about it, compared to them this one isn’t so bad. Staying optimistic is the best I can do, and it really helps. Worrying won’t solve anything, in fact it would just make things worse. I’m not going to think about it. Not thinking about my past sleep issues or the low chance of having future sleep issues. I’m just going to think about the present; because if I’m happy here, why would I want to be anywhere else?
Anyways, it’s 5:11 PM, started typing at 5:05 PM. This is a quick one, but that’s good, because only tragedies need details, because each detail hurts so much. But these feelings, there so wonderful that I gloss over them. Reading over this may feel like nothing to you, but it means a lot to me. After all, you are supposed to right for yourself. Ahhh… Happy thoughts…
Update
This is just a habit of thinking, and I went overboard on links again. Dangit.
Seesh, 19 links. NINETEEN! Ok, this is OCD and I’m not going to let it take advantage of me. I’m relaxing, done. Sure, I got hyped for this inositol
But that’s it. Just this. I’m not going to worry about it, I’m going to wait until I can do it (wish I had money for it now). I’ll be patient, get better at managing this (have improved a lot though), and will be happy. Actually, OCD people have the same thoughts everyone has, our only difference is how we react.
I definitely overreacted here and can feel the stress because of it. I’m just going to relax and think about happy thoughts, because nothing is more valuable than happiness. Who cares about making an advanced strategy for it, my brain will get better on it’s own, like those in years before have.
Help me Lord Jesus Christ.
I guess this was necessary, because my project is what motivated me from the beginning. If it hadn’t been for this, then I wouldn’t be in the position I am today. To grab my happiness, and cuddle it, and keep it. Amen.